The Saddest Little Flower Garden in Town

That’s right. The saddest little flower garden in town belongs to someone who claims to have an “emerald thumb.” It didn’t start out sad. It started out with a ton of ambition and planning. There were even charts and sketches! Plots and maps!

Strategizing.

My mud-splattered flower bed plan. Finished! 1.5 hrs start to end.

I even took a “before” shot:

Seeds sown: alyssum, dwarf hollyhock, black eyed Susan, dwarf snapdragon, old fashioned mix, snapdragon, zinnia, flowering kale. Fingers: crossed.

That was 3 months ago. Today, much to my disappointment, it looks like this:

Saddest garden ever.
Saddest garden ever.

I don’t even know what happened. I sowed alyssum, dwarf hollyhock, black eyed Susan, dwarf snapdragon, old fashioned mix, regular snapdragon, flowering kale, and zinnia. The stupid bachelors buttons are perennials (those scrubby looking things that have all fallen over) and I forgot about them in my planning frenzy. Basically I got a few seeds to germinate, and a ton of weeds.

Here are some close-up shots. I could’ve just posted these and let you think I had some fabulous flower garden, but that’s not how it is. Sometimes I fail. It’s not a good feeling, but it’s how we learn. AND LEARN, I DID, DAMN IT!

Bachelors button. Looks so beautiful up close, and in arrangements, but flopped over on the dirt, not so much.
Bachelors button. Looks so beautiful up close, and in arrangements, but flopped over on the dirt, not so much.
Alyssum--great for borders. Not great if only 2 come up. It sucks at border patrol.
Alyssum–great for borders. Not great if only 2 come up. It sucks at border patrol.
Ornamental kale--this is the first time I've successfully grown it from seeds. "Successfully" is a relative term.
Ornamental kale–this is the first time I’ve successfully grown it from seeds. “Successfully” is a relative term.
Last year, zinnias were all I planted in this bed. Should've stuck with that.
Last year, zinnias were all I planted in this bed. Should’ve stuck with that.
One's flat, the other is cone-shaped. Weird, but cool.
One’s flat, the other is cone-shaped. Weird, but cool.

This concludes the tour of the saddest little flower garden ever. I hope to do better next year. I’m tossing around the thought of chucking the flowers and dedicating the entire space to herbs, but that seems like giving up. Maybe I’ll actually spring for plants instead of trying to start from seeds. That is probably the best idea for a beginner–that way, I can stage things first and not wait 2 months to find out I screwed up and could possibly still move things around.

Lastly, my thoughts about this garden, best expressed by Tom Brady because this is the only thing I enjoy watching him do: